Facing forward

let your dream become your passion – My leap Of Faith

Owning my truth becoming authentically me

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Exhausted mentally, physically and emotionally – so is this what it feels like to truly surrender. ummmm yet i thought I surrendered already! ‪#‎laughing‬ I have a strange vibration going through my body at the moment, my hands are shaking.
I’m thrilled yet also freaking out as, I have realised this is one of those, “AHA” moments. Freaking out actually, this feeling, this realization, YES !!!! So many tears, heavy heart, remind myself to breathe, you going to be okay, breathe, relax, breathe.
Somehow, the dots started to connect, all those feelings deep within my core, this goes way back literally 35 years back.
I am trying hard to stay present in the moment as i know, this is what I have longed for, for so long.
My truth is this what my authentic self feels like.
This is exactly why I have felt so stuck, I need to break free, repeating the same pattern in my relationships, I cant do that anymore, this is why I have always lost my identity in my relationship.
Truthfully I have always felt, trapped, lonely, not worthy, numb, why did I always feel the need for approval. Constantly looking for eternal fixes to make me feel whole. The need to be needed and need to love! Looking within myself for that love, no no that was never a thought! Honestly because their was no one to love. I didnt have a messed up childhood, it was a loving and caring home, yet I did feel I had to constantly achieve an excel  like my twin sisters. there was alot of pressure,  over time I lost my value and self worth. How could my parents possibly love me if I was so stupid.‪#‎sadden‬ ‪#‎hectic‬ ‪#‎blacksheep‬
So now I gently will sit with this feeling and take a Huge breathe, try not to cry anymore, walk to the mirror, look up slowly, smile and say ” Hi – I am Wendy, lovely to meet you”.

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Author: WendyC

I am South African - recently started my own business, taking a leap of faith to be so brave, uplifting the people around me by sharing my life story, is why i have decided to blog. I hope to encourage, inspire and connect with others who are on a similar journey

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